Dernières actualités https://mooc.remixthecommons.org/? fr-FR Copyright (c) 2026 Mooc des communs Fri, 15 May 2026 00:15:47 +0200 http://www.stervinou.com/projets/rss/ Economie Sociale et Solidaire contact@yeswiki.net (Mr YesWiki) contact@yeswiki.net (Mr YesWiki) 60 Dernières actualités https:#yeswiki.net/themes/margot/images/favicon.png https://mooc.remixthecommons.org/? Honey, I’m home!

Honey, I’m home!

Description We Lived Separate Lives
We Were Living Like Roommates
The Real Reason You Haven't Found Your Perfect Partner
Why Aren't You Married? Facing Your Love Alibi
Ever Have A False Positive In Dating?
When Love Manifestation Turns Into Mani-Frustration
Are You Discounting Yourself In Love?
Ordering Love Like A Latte
Looking For A Quick Fix For Your Love Life?
Impatient for Mr. Right?

Did I scare you? I mean, did you think my long silence was due to the fact that I was marooned in a snow drift somewhere freezing to death? Or perhaps I’d been thrown from the bobsled and run over? Were you grieving for me?

Yeah right. I know you were really just annoyed that I hadn’t said anything yet. Well fine. Whatever. I’m okay though.

In fact, LC and I had a grand time playing in the snow. While I did not prove my amazing athletic acumen, I also did not manage to fall over, injure myself, or do anything else with a potentially high amusement value while we were out there. I did, however, learn to properly appreciate the value of good snow pants and a wooly hat.

Unfortunately, on the drive home from our weekend in the snow, I caught a deadly virus of some sort and landed myself flat on my back in bed for an entire week. And not in the fun way. So that explains my failure to update in a timely fashion. Never fear though, I have returned to health again so my antics here will not suffer permanent damage.

And I missed you too. ;)
Début de l'événement 15.04.2023
Fin de l'événement 15.04.2023
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]]> Tue, 15 Apr 2025 17:40:13 +0200 A good distraction

A good distraction

Description There’s No Such Thing as a “Good” or “Bad” Marriage
A Married Man Needs Only 3 Things From His Wife
I Am Not The Caretaker of My Marriage
10 Guilty Pleasures For Couples
The Man Behind How I Have It All
14 Ways Having Kids Affects Your Relationship
Love Rewards the Brave
The Book That Changed the Way I Look at Love
When Divorce Runs in the Family
The Silence That Can Save Your Relationship
Is It Ever OK to Lie to Your Spouse?

The day after my first date with the adorable Teen Crush*, he texted that he had a wonderful night, and was "really" looking forward to seeing me again. Very giddy-making indeed! After a few text exchanges, we set up a date for this weekend. I'm smiling now just thinking about him.

After what felt like an interminable wait, (a few days after our last date) I got a typically understated e-mail from UN. In the past, I think it's been about 50/50 in terms of who's initiated contact -- this time, I decided that it would be him, as a way of trying to gauge his interest. I shocked myself with my self-restraint -- either I'm getting stronger, OR I'm finding it easier now that there's another potential interest in the picture. So now we're in planning limbo, as we try to sort out our schedules and figure out when we can get together. I'm still planning to have "the talk"!


Please note: I do NOT have a crush on a teenager! See previous post for blog name explanation.
first date with Lovebyelenita:
Date #103: Lovebyelenita
When I was about 12 or 13 years old, I had my first crush ever, the son of some new friends of my parents, and he was just charming and adorable. Tonight’s date wasn’t actually that boy (imagine if he had turned up!) but looked enough like him that I did a double-take when we first met.

Some strolling, some wine – plenty to talk about, and I think I sensed a connection. At the end of the date, he told me he’d had a really nice time, and hoped we could get together again soon. Only a few hours together, and I sensed a level of warmth that I don’t think I’ve ever felt with UN. I know – it’s wrong to compare – but it’s unavoidable.
Début de l'événement 10.04.2024
Fin de l'événement 10.04.2024
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]]> Thu, 10 Apr 2025 11:20:44 +0200 Phishing SMS and Netflix: What You Need to Know

Phishing SMS and Netflix: What You Need to Know

Description In today's digital age, streaming services like Netflix have become an essential part of our entertainment experience. However, issues with Netflix, including Netflix not working, frequent crashes, or slow Netflix streams, can be frustrating. Meanwhile, another growing concern is the rise of phishing SMS messages targeting unsuspecting users. In this article, we'll explore how these two issues intersect, offering tips on how to deal with common Netflix problems and avoid falling for phishing scams.

Phishing SMS and Netflix Accounts
phishing sms netflix have become an increasingly prevalent way for cybercriminals to steal personal information. Phishing SMS messages are text messages that appear legitimate but are designed to deceive you into revealing sensitive data, such as your login credentials, payment information, or personal identity details.

For Netflix users, phishing SMS often masquerades as a service alert or warning about your account. For example, you might receive a message claiming that your Netflix account has been suspended due to suspicious activity and that you need to click a link to verify your account or update payment information. These messages can seem official and may even use Netflix's logo or other recognizable elements. However, they are usually malicious, aiming to steal your login credentials or infect your device with malware.

If you ever receive such a message, it's crucial to avoid clicking on any links or providing any personal information. Instead, always visit the Netflix website directly or open the Netflix app to check your account status.

why does my netflix keep crashing?
One common issue Netflix users face is the app or website frequently crashing. Netflix not working can occur for various reasons, and knowing how to fix it is essential. A variety of factors could be at play:

Device Compatibility: Sometimes, Netflix may not be compatible with older devices or operating systems. If you find that your Netflix app keeps crashing, ensure that both your device and app are updated to the latest versions.

Poor Internet Connection: A weak or fluctuating internet connection can lead to Netflix streaming issues, including constant crashes. Check your Wi-Fi connection speed and ensure that your internet bandwidth is sufficient for streaming HD or 4K content.

Cache or App Bugs: Over time, the app's cache might accumulate corrupted data, which can result in Netflix crashing unexpectedly. Clearing the app cache or reinstalling the app can often resolve these issues.

Outdated App or Browser: If you are using Netflix on a browser or an app, make sure you're using the latest version. Older versions of the app or browser may be incompatible with Netflix’s latest updates, leading to crashes.

netflix streams slow: Causes and Fixes
Another common complaint among Netflix users is slow Netflix streams. Watching a show or movie on Netflix only to encounter constant buffering can ruin your viewing experience. Several factors contribute to slow streaming on Netflix, and understanding them can help improve your experience:

Internet Speed: One of the most common causes of slow Netflix streams is an insufficient internet connection. Netflix recommends at least 3 Mbps for SD quality, 5 Mbps for HD, and 25 Mbps for 4K streaming. Check your internet speed and, if possible, switch to a higher-speed plan to improve performance.

Network Congestion: Sometimes, slow Netflix streams occur because many devices are connected to your home network, consuming bandwidth. Try limiting the number of devices connected or prioritize your streaming device to enhance performance.

Netflix Server Issues: Occasionally, Netflix servers themselves may experience issues, leading to slow streaming for all users in a particular region. If you notice Netflix streaming issues across multiple devices, it may be worth checking Netflix’s official Twitter account or service status page for updates.

Router Settings: The type of Wi-Fi router you're using can also affect streaming speeds. Older routers might not support the speeds required for smooth Netflix viewing. Consider upgrading to a newer router that supports higher speeds and better signal strength.

Protecting Yourself from Phishing SMS
As phishing scams become more sophisticated, it's important to take proactive steps to safeguard your Netflix account and personal information. Here are some tips to protect yourself from phishing SMS:

Don't Trust Unknown Senders: Always be cautious of unsolicited messages. Phishing SMS messages often appear to come from Netflix or other trusted companies but are from unknown numbers.

Enable Two-Factor Authentication (2FA): Netflix supports two-factor authentication, which can add an extra layer of security to your account. Enabling 2FA will make it harder for hackers to access your account, even if they obtain your login details.

Look for Red Flags: Phishing messages often contain subtle red flags, such as urgent language, spelling errors, or suspicious links. Avoid clicking on links in these messages, and always navigate directly to the official Netflix website if you're uncertain.

Use Security Software: Keep your devices protected with up-to-date antivirus or anti-malware software. These tools can help detect malicious links or attachments in phishing SMS messages.

Conclusion
Dealing with issues like netflix does not work, Netflix crashes, or slow Netflix streams can be frustrating, but most of the time, these problems are fixable with a few simple troubleshooting steps. At the same time, it's important to stay vigilant against phishing SMS scams that could compromise your Netflix account and personal data. By following best practices for account security and staying aware of common phishing techniques, you can ensure a safer and smoother Netflix experience.
Début de l'événement 02.04.2022
Fin de l'événement 02.04.2022
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]]> Wed, 02 Apr 2025 09:24:07 +0200 Whoa…calm down crazy.

Whoa…calm down crazy.

Description Marriage vs. Addiction: Winning the Battle for Love
Marriage Without Intimacy: Can Love Survive the Distance?
Holding On or Letting Go: When Addiction Tests a Marriage
The Marriage We Almost Lost: How Unemployment Changed Everything
Marriage And Chaos: Finding Common Ground in Parenting
He Seemed Interested. So Why Didn’t He Call?
Online Dating Isn’t Desperation
Changing Your Dating Approach
Why Modern Dating is More Complicated Than Ever
Dating Someone With Debt
Marriage vs. Parenthood: Life After Having a Baby
The Fine Line Between Casual Dating and Commitment
How to Handle the Truth After Discovering a Betray


He’ll take that olive branch because he gets to stop feeling all that social pressure, and now you’re bros.

This is REALLY powerful. You would be surprised how many people, guys, girls, hot girls, tough MMA type guys, etc. will cave to social pressure and how much power you have when you can consciously wield that social pressure. It’s fascinating.

“Me: Whoa…calm down crazy.”

haha a good response to neutralize her shit. You’re basically still leading the conversation like “calm your tits woman, we’re all just talking here, it’s fine.” and re-enforcing your frame that what you’re doing isn’t weird.

But it doesn’t quite win her over:

“5.5 was annoyed”

Because there’s no olive branch and you don’t give her an excuse for her actions that she can latch onto to keep the “I’m not a shitty human being who acted badly earlier” frame in her mind. Know what I mean? This is a really subtle thing but really important when it comes to running group theory game which is something you’re going to be doing a lot of, so if it doesn’t make complete sense, let me know and I can try to elaborate further.

Notice in my other post I mentioned that for a short guy, it’s better for you to be approaching groups with hot girls in them, because you get a chance to demonstrate your value, THEN you can zero in on a target and escalate from there. Being short, you’re approaching with a deficit of value in their stereotypical view of the world, so if you go direct you don’t get a chance to demonstrate how awesome you are…but when you jump into the gladiator ring and go head to head with some lions (aka shit-tests, her bitchy friends, etc.) and come out victorious, NOW you have high-value.

Imagine if, at this point, a hot shooter girl you always flirt with, comes over and grabs you and flirts with you. What would THAT do to the dynamics of this group where you’ve won them over and shown enough value for the 7 and 7.5 to approve of you and you know the 7 is a little bit interested (there’s a spark there, as evidenced by her throwing you a sword earlier, and her asking your name before she goes later)? Then imagine your buddy brings you a beer, because you’re so pimp that your buddies supplicate to you? Then imagine the manager of the bar goes “Scray!! What’s up man! Hey girls, watch out for this guy, he’s trouble! ;) ” and buys the table a round of shots.
Début de l'événement 27.03.2022
Fin de l'événement 27.03.2022
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]]> Thu, 27 Mar 2025 17:45:23 +0100 Say What Now

Say What Now

Description How a Meddling Mother Nearly Ruined My Marriage
How We Rebuilt Our Marriage Through Therapy
Saving a Marriage After an Affair
Can Marriage Survive Infidelity?
Is Your Marriage a Partnership or a Prison?
Keep Him From Walking Out That Door
Managing Expectations in Dating
Why I Believe In Marriage
Dating Advice From Happily Married Couples
The Man or the Money
Walk Away From Parental Control in Relationships
When You’re Stuck in the “Casual Dating” Zone
A Necessary Courtesy or Just Overkill in Online Dating?

I was having a conversation the other night with friends about stuff that drives guys crazy. (more on that on later, or not) It got me thinking about things guys do that drive me crazy, and more importantly things guy say that drive me crazy! You know those things you never want to hear a guy say again.

The following are 10 things I never want to hear another boy say to me (Again)!

1) “You have a cute little tummy.”

Are you serious right now!? I am like 99.9862% positive you just called me fat.

2) “I forgot how great you are.”

Of course I’m great you tard! I’m amazing in fact, and all that time you spent away/forgetting me was totally your loss!

3) “If you also have toast and bacon or sausage that would be great too.”

Dude I just made you eggs, fruit, and coffee and this is the first time we’ve had sex. Check yourself! Then check yourself again!

4) “Don’t forget your granny panties.”

They may or may not fall under the category of “granny panties” that is irrelevant. All I know is you seemed pretty excited to be seeing them earlier so pay them some respect.

5) “Can I take a shower?”

I’m going to let you cause I’m a good hostess, but No, no you cannot take a shower. Unless we are in a committed relationship or we are spending the whole day together you cannot use my shower and use a perfectly clean towel, or my expensive shampoo. Pick up your dirty clothes put them on and leave.

6) “We have to lay sideways on the bed or it makes noise.”

Ok I get it your bed squeaks when we “move”, that is cool I can respect that. But if it makes those noises just from a little motion you need to either get a new bed frame or find someone else who is comfortable only “being” in one spot.

7) “I’m not really looking for a serious relationship right now.”

Dude! Did you hear me at anytime say I was? Wow, you’re great and all, but your heads getting big. I like you and you interest me that is all…. Nobody mentioned a relationship and I sure as hell didn’t mention babies!

8) “That was my ex girlfriends I just haven’t gotten around to throwing it out.”

Please note if you have been out of a relationship more then 2weeks your apartment should Not include the following: makeup, nail polish, jewelry which obviously cost less the $20, female deodorant, a curling or flat iron, or tampons. (Also, unless you guys lived together your apartment should never include the above)

9) “Are you going to write about me?”

Only when you say stupid ass stuff like that, Einstein! I’m spending time with you which means I probably like you enough to not subject you to being mentioned in a silly blog, or I will write about you once you become a douche-bag.

10) “What do you like to do for fun?”

I’m here right now and I was having fun until you started asking stupid questions like that.

(reason #_why I’m single: I can’t control my eye rolls when people say stupid things.)

SIDEBAR: I also have no desire to get into someone else’s dirty shower.
Début de l'événement 26.03.2025
Fin de l'événement 26.03.2025
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]]> Wed, 26 Mar 2025 17:16:55 +0100 A Vampire Sequel

A Vampire Sequel

Description Surviving a Long-Term Affair and Saving a Marriage
Transforming Communication and Parenting in a Troubled Marriage
Healing a Marriage by Confronting Insecurities and Building Trust
Religious Differences and Strengthening Marriage Bonds
The Affection Gap: Bridging Emotional Distance in a Long-Term Marriage
Workplace Dating Detours
When Blind Dates Go Wrong
Comfort Vs. Fulfillment In Modern Dating
Demanding Respect and Openness in a Relationship
Get Outta My Dating Pool
Seeking Clarity and Connection in Dating
Gym Flirting 101
Finding Balance in Love After Loss

Earlier today I posted a blog called “Emotional Vampires” and despite the word “vampires” in the title and most people’s aversion to the vampire craze…it got great hits and even better comments! I was moved to continue exploring this topic when I realized that I wasn’t the only one who was plagued by people who drain me.

Sometimes I think that it is my lot in life to be that person that everyone goes to when they are having a rough time. It’s not their fault, and I can’t blame them, it’s kind of how I market myself. Not consciously, but all the same, it’s the way I am. I am that caring, understanding, constant ear and shoulder that everyone knows can’t turn them away. I have only recently learned that confrontation and disagreement is not a bad thing. People are used to me taking their shit so they never think twice about laying all their crap at my feet and asking me to fix it. I have always allowed it, so I can’t blame them when they continue to do it.

I was a psychology major in college. I have the degree hanging above my desk and everything, really I do. People fascinate me, they always have. The way people think, interact, engage one another, behave, etc…it’s all so damn interesting to me. I love listening to people share with me and then trying to determine the deeper and baser emotions and contributing issues. I know it’s wrong, but dissecting the situation is fun for me.




I won’t even hide the fact that I judge people. I know it’s not politically correct or acceptable to admit that, but I do. I listen to their problems and then I judge them. I will never betray a confidence. I do not gossip. But, in my head, in my own thoughts I do judge people by what they reveal to me. I know some people will think that this makes me a horrible person but I really do think that all people do this. If you are being honest with yourself, you do form judgments about a person based on their behaviors, interactions with others, and their personality. It’s just a fact of life.

I will also freely admit that because of my history with depression I can sometimes be that emotional vampire that feeds on other people. I don’t want anyone to think that I am professing to be above this. While I often bottle up and deal with issues on my own, try to psychoanalyze myself, I will occasionally need to have an all out bitch fest and seriously bring down the mood. I always feel guilty about this afterwards and apologize with a bottle of wine…so my friends usually don’t mind. J The point here is, while I talk about the people that make me nuts…realize that I am sometimes that exact person. As George stated…the key here is sometimes.

So, as I read through the comments to my original post I realized that in one way or another everyone has had to deal with these draining, emotional vampires. I think it’s important to be realistic about relationships. Not everyone can be sunshine and rainbows all of the time. I don’t expect them to be. I don’t need you to blow smoke up my ass either. It’s okay to be real. It is okay to need advice, reassurance, and support. I have no problems being that person for you; I love being that person for you.

I do take issue with the people who assume you have nothing better to do with your time than listen to a 2 hour rant about their hideous fortune, bad job, mean boss, ungrateful family, distant boyfriend, yadda, yadda, yadda. If you need to vent, do it, but give me the condensed version and for the love of all things sacred, acknowledge that you know you are bitching and have the good graces to thank me for listening to you drone on. I never vent to people without thanking them for allowing me to get it off my chest and asking them in return how they are holding up and giving them the chance to do the same thing right back. It’s common freaking courtesy. Reciprocate, people!



If you are down in the dumps and aware that you are being extra negative then own up to it; don’t act as though there is nothing wrong. I have no problem if you are a bit blue, it happens, but have the decency to say to your friend/significant other, “Hey, I know that I haven’t been myself lately. I am working through it and really appreciate your patience and understanding. If it gets to be too much for you please let me know so we can talk about it.”

It can be hard to admit that you aren’t the happy go lucky person you wish you could be but it’s important to let the people you love know you appreciate their support. It wasn’t easy for me to realize this. For a long time I thought that if they were my friend they would accept that I was having a hard time regulating my medicine and mood but nobody has to put up with my shit. I realized the stress that my moods put on my relationships and realized that thanks were necessary so that they knew I saw what I was putting them through and appreciated it. I am so blessed that I found writing, journaling, crafting, and laughing was much better medicine than the drugs I was taking and have been able to regulate my moods on my own for about 8 years now. It wasn’t always this easy though. So trust that I understand when you have a rough time, I am not going to walk away, but I do ask that you be aware of your mood and how it affects other people.

I have never enjoyed being the center of attention. I enjoy getting a good laugh from a crowd. I enjoy being active in a conversation and having my voice be heard but I don’t need to be the loudest, most circulated, and talked about person in the room. I am happy to be a part of it all and that’s enough. I know for some people this isn’t enough though. There are certain people that “get off”, for lack of a better word, on being in the middle of it all and having all that attention. To them I have this piece of advice…and yes I know you didn’t ask for it, but here it is.

It’s fine to want to be heard and occasionally be the center of attention. Nobody is trying to say that’s wrong but do be aware of how often this is the case. It’s important when you are in social situations to gauge how much you are speaking and how much you are listening; to be aware of listening versus active listening. The difference there is that when you listen you vaguely hear what somebody is saying but only enough to register what you want to say in response. When you actively listen to somebody you hear, acknowledge, and process their comments. It is important that you give that person your full attention. If you want others to respect you enough to listen when you speak then do the same for them, which means no cell phones, no checking emails, texting, or looking around the room at everyone but the person speaking.



As I have said, I am nowhere near perfect when it comes to being needy sometimes and being moody at others. I don’t expect perfection in my friends. I do expect you to try for a balance, to acknowledge your flaws (as I have mine) and to be open to trying to solve your emotional vampire ways. If it starts to be an issue in a relationship I am having I will not hesitate to tell somebody, “I know that you have been having a hard time lately and I want to be supportive but I need to tell you that I’m having a hard time right now. I find myself listening less actively because I feel like you aren’t reciprocating and I am withdrawing because of it.” I don’t want to end up resenting or ending friendships, so I do ask of my friends that they be open to talks like that. I in return promise to always be open to them as well.

I would hate to think that I was bringing somebody down or being anything less than a stellar friend so I do ask that friends come to me before letting emotions fester. I have had a lot of success with this but it does require a lot of trust and understanding between the two people involved. It’s not always easy to accept criticism about yourself and it’s often even more terrifying to give it to somebody else and risk hurting feelings but I do think it’s essential to some relationships. There are friendships I have never had to worry about doing this in, but if need be I have no qualms about opening up a line of conversation about boundaries and balance.

This is a whole lot of my own personal opinions and in no way are they set rules, but they do work for me…so hey…they may work for you as well. In the end it comes down to talking with the person versus ending a friendship, and while it is sometimes necessary to end the relationship, I usually prefer to avoid that.
Début de l'événement 24.03.2022
Fin de l'événement 24.03.2022
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]]> Mon, 24 Mar 2025 17:45:25 +0100 Tinder Confessions: Thanksgiving Edition

Tinder Confessions: Thanksgiving Edition

Description He Went to War and Came Back a Changed Man
Unmasking Hidden Unhappiness in Marriage
Workaholic Heartbreak: When Success Costs Your Marriage
Recession Realities: When Financial Stress Tests a Marriage
When Unemployment Tests Marriage
Movies That All Women Should See To Understand Men
Love Lies and Responsibility
The Dating Mishaps of the Ladies of Love Twenty
The Black Male Preference Privilege
Anatomy of a Great (Reality) Relationship
Your Rear End or Your Pride
Why Splitting Costs Isn't Splitting Love
(Broken) Laws of Attraction

While my previous posts are from a few months ago, I thought I’d change it up for a special Thanksgiving date I went on recently. You read that right: a Thanksgiving date.

I got a most unusual Tinder message a few days ago:




I was initially hesitant since I had thrilling plans for Saturday like going to the gym, doing laundry and returning a cardigan to Target. Potential Friendsgiving negatives? A super awkward date at a party with strangers, who could also potentially be weird or awkward or boring. And unlike meeting for drinks—the standard first date—there’s a much longer time commitment. Guaranteed positives? Free food and sweatpants. Plus he offered to pick me up. Even easier. After consulting a few friends I decided to just go with it. (side note: I found out later this was actually his very first Tinder date!)

He picked me up, crockpot of green bean casserole, dessert, and beer ready to go in the back. Clean car. Safe driving. Non-awkward conversation. Everything was looking up.

Then we arrived at the party, and a small wave of panic hit me as I walked in: I was the weirdo from the internet at a random stranger’s party. And this was not a large party, mind you. There were maybe 10 or so people there at the beginning (and around 20 by the end). No escaping or blending in. I got a strange look or two as we walked in, and then I was introduced as the girl from Tinder. To my relief, everyone thought it was funny. A friendly girl offered me a Pilgrim party hat and a glass of wine, and we started chatting away about her experience with some other dating app called Hinge (which I’d never heard of).

Everyone was so nice! And easy to talk to. I almost always hate mingling at parties where I don’t know many people (or no one at all!), but I quickly realized that I actually got along quite well with this group. In fact, being the girl from Tinder became a great conversation starter whenever people asked how I knew my date—we’ll call him Paul. “You’re here with Paul? How did you meet?” “Oh, we met about an hour and a half ago when he picked me up for the party.” Definitely an intriguing start to a conversation. I’d also like to take this moment to dish out a little piece of advice on making friends with fellow females: Compliment and/or ask her about her hair. “Do you use a wand or a curling iron? I love your hair!” I ask out of genuine curiosity (because I’ve always been a curling iron kinda girl but have considered trying out a wand), but I’ve found it’s a great conversation starter, almost like a pickup line for making friends. And most girls, including myself, can go on and on about hair. Seriously, try it sometime.

But back to Friendsgiving…

Everyone finally arrived, and the food was all ready to go. We feasted, we lounged, and then someone mentioned some crazy game called Slap the Bag. Apparently it’s a Midwestern drinking game staple (everyone was from the Midwest) but totally foreign to me. It’s very simple: Someone holds a bag of wine while someone else slaps the bag and then chugs the wine for however long they please. Not exactly a “game,” but, of course, since I’d never “played,” they insisted I try it out. I was not disappointed. In fact, I highly recommend it. Who doesn’t want to slap a massive bag of wine and then chug it while being cheered on by a room of newly acquired friends wearing Native American feathered headbands and Pilgrim hats? Definitely the best way to enjoy top-notch bagged wine. Paul was even thoughtful enough to record this important milestone on my own phone so I can relive the moment whenever I want.

After a few more slaps, they broke out the beer pong table. I continued bonding with my new friends on the sidelines and even exchanged numbers with one girl before Paul and I took our turn at beer pong. It was not a pretty game for us. But it didn’t matter (because everyone’s a winner in beer pong, right?). It was getting late. We’d been drinking for nearly 7 hours and this point, and eventually Paul and I ended up making out in the kitchen (oops?).

All in all, it was a great Friendsgiving. Will I see Paul again? Who knows. But I do have plans to hang out with some of my other new friends after Thanksgiving. I’d call that a win!

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!
Début de l'événement 20.03.2023
Fin de l'événement 20.03.2023
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]]> Thu, 20 Mar 2025 17:32:42 +0100 The Importance of Individual Growth Within a Marriage.

The Importance of Individual Growth Within a Marriage.

Description He Had an Affair Because I Stopped Initiating Sex
He Makes Me Feel Bad About Being Fat
He Lost Interest in Our Marriage
Saving A Marriage: He Lost His Job
He Lets His Mother Rule Our Lives and I'm Sick of It
Commitment Jitters
Love and Lust: When Chemistry Outruns Endurance
Bi Bi Love
Dealing With Your Partner’s Bedroom Confessions
Can His Squalor Be Squelched?
Asunder Down Under
Conquering Long Distance Dating
Coveting a Coworker

Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 8 Thumb down 5

Reply
Andthatswhyyouresingle says:
February 13, 2012 at 4:10 pm
Was with first boyfriend 5 years and husband 5 years so that would give me 10 years of long term relationship experience with some fun online and non online dating experiences in between. Is that enough experience for you?

I asked:

What adult, mature, healthy relationship experience have you even had?

I’m still waiting for the adult, mature healthy examples. Not some relationship you had as a teenager. You don’t have to answer my question. I’m just trying to point out that you are hardly a poster child for marriage or mature relationships, so you really need to stop trotting out Mr. Buns of Steel who makes great coffee as evidence you do.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 5 Thumb down 3

Reply
Saj says:
February 13, 2012 at 5:15 pm
Rofl sorry I’m not as old as you would like me to be. I can’t really do anything about that. But for being 30 years old I think I’ve had quite a lot of long term relationship and dating experience and feel I have a right to my opinion just as much as the anti relationship guys, or the never been in a long term relationship at 40 girls or the girls dating men who still live with their parents. We all have very varied experiences that makes our advice and comments complex.
Début de l'événement 18.03.2023
Fin de l'événement 18.03.2023
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]]> Tue, 18 Mar 2025 17:28:49 +0100 What to Do When You Feel Unappreciated in Your Marriage

What to Do When You Feel Unappreciated in Your Marriage

Description He Cheats on Me During Business Trips
He Cheated with a Woman from the Gym
He Dotes On His Son and Ignores Me
He Didn't Know How to Listen to Her
He Flirts Too Much
Marriage Advice: 13 Lessons
Separate Vacations Don’t Have to Mean Divorce
Are Soul Mates Fact or Fiction?
Love vs. Parenthood: When the Perfect Partner Doesn’t Want Kids
Caring for Dad Is Destroying My Marriage
First Date: Who Pays and What It Really Means
Dating a Dad: When You Like Him But Not His Kid

Cali Bradshaw
October 11, 2011 at 6:17 pm #
With all due respect, this statement is moronic. You left out a key aspect of prostitution…. the exchange of sex. But in any case, for the one millionth time, I am not saying a guy has to pay. I simply wrote this post to explain why woman want to be paid for, in the hopes of helping guys who sometimes feel like they just don’t understand us. You can call me/us anything you want, but it doesn’t change the fact that a lot of woman feel this way.

Reply

Mark
March 27, 2012 at 12:51 pm #
“You can call me/us anything you want, but it doesn’t change the fact that a lot of woman feel this way.”

Fair enough. And a lot of men want women to be submissive houswives who cook, clean and provide sex when it’s requested.

You can call me/us anything you want, but it doesn’t change the fact that a lot of men feel this way.

I suppose that disclaimer trumps the sexism in both our expectations of the opposite sex?

Reply

Zerbu
October 16, 2011 at 11:36 pm #
Début de l'événement 17.03.2022
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]]> Mon, 17 Mar 2025 16:50:25 +0100 Finding Love or Just Validation The Real Reason People Use Dating Apps

Finding Love or Just Validation The Real Reason People Use Dating Apps

Description We’re All Slutty For The Right Guy
Dear Men: This Is Why Loyalty Is So Important To Women
How Do You Avoid Dating a Liberal/Conservative?
Are You Looking For Fast Love Too?
Should You Fake an Active Lifestyle for Love?
When a Relationship Feels Like a Secret Mission
Pushing Through It
Embracing The Unexpected Path Of Singlehood
Why Is It So Hard to Believe Someone Might Stay?
Am I Crazy Or Is He A Hot Mess?


Comments? Thoughts? This is based on science and careful study but I’m always open to postulation.

More often than not, men and women are ships passing in the night, never quite existing on the same level. This phenom is the subject of endless study and speculation, but never is it more the case than at the beginning of a courtship – such a delicate period of wide error margins and tricky variables.

Sounds like a job for math and statistics, and it is. I introduce to the world the Rothman graph (fig. A). Let me break it down. The Level of Interest is the amount of interest and enthusiasm (sexual or otherwise) each has for the other. The Level of Familiarity is how well they know each other, defined by time.

You will quickly notice the extreme distance between the man and woman on the level of interest in the beginning: the woman is on the lowest level while the man is that the very top. This is because men, generally stimulated and driven by visual stimuli, believes from the beginning that she is perfect for him – even though he knows nothing about her. She’s hot, she’s the one. Period.

Women, however, reserve interest in the beginning; their levels rise only with time and familiarity. Indeed, she needs to know “the real” him, and interest is yoked to time. So the disconnect here is obvious and, much of the time, irreconcilable; the results then are all too predictable.

They only come together, literally, upon conception; almost immediately after each takes their, sharp dramatic turn in opposite trajectories. Ironically, the end result is mutual – utter confusion. But we now understand there is nothing to be confused about, and can only hope that lightning strikes and the warring opposites get set on the same (or at least similar) course.

Comments? Thoughts? This is based on science and careful study but I’m always open to postulation.Good Things: stability; predictable haircut; calculating manner that can apply to other aspects of life in positive ways, for example sex; always on time; will never cheat on you.
Début de l'événement 11.03.2022
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]]> Tue, 11 Mar 2025 17:34:14 +0100 I recently found out my husband was on this site

I recently found out my husband was on this site

Description The Top 10 White Lies People Tell In Online Dating Profiles
Things I Wish I Knew About Dating When I Was 22
8 Reasons You’re Single
Let’s Talk About Negging
What Are Your Pre-Date Nerves?
10 Things You Should Never Say To A Man In Bed
8 Things Men Want Women To Do In Bed
9 Things I Dread About Dating
I Wasn’t Jewish Enough

But it is what it is. New pussy was the single most exciting thing that has happened to me since the last time I had new pussy so many years ago. It was great just because it was different. I needed it like you need a massage or a vacation every so often. Being balls deep in another woman just for the sake of it was the thrill of a lifetime. I’ll definitely do it again sometime if I have the chance. No regrets but not down on family life either. In fact, I’m totally rejuvenated and looking forward to those never-ending travel team baseball games.

Billy had a mistress down on “A” and 12th
She was that little somethin’ that he did for himself
His own little secret didn’t hurt nobody…

Dr. Rosenpenis5 years agoReply
I recently found out my husband was on this site, hes either a liar or these women are just as foul if hes on here hooking up! well obviously a liar, but its disgusting to me that people would do this, how do you explain yourself to the “hook up” wouldnt a person feel like a giant pile of crap doing this and lying about it to themselves, their family and the new found friend, and if honest, these women need to realize that “not finding any decent men” is maybe more their fault than they think!

ED4 years agoReply
You are a judgmental bitch.

Have you been in a long marriage where you love your spouse, but they are always tired, distant, cold, unfeeling? Have you ever watched your relationship deteriorate into polite hellos and good nights….? Have you ever sacrificed your own happiness to save your children the hardship of a divorce. Have you ever waited through years of sadness just to keep your family together, because you love them too much to leave…no matter what you are treated like? Have you? If you haven’t then get off your high horse. Yes, maybe Tinder isn’t the best idea for a married man, but sometimes it takes getting caught to start the ending that his marriage obviously needed. Instead of making him feel bad and telling him he was creepy and that you and your friends were laughing at him, why not simply ignore him?
Début de l'événement 25.02.2025
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]]> Tue, 25 Feb 2025 10:31:26 +0100 Financial Stress and Divorce When Money Problems Become Marriage Problems

Financial Stress and Divorce When Money Problems Become Marriage Problems

Description I Travel The World. Alone.
An Internal Monologue While Perusing Online Dating Matches
How To Hook Up In A Hostel есть 100 дубликат на frisky
How Do You Know When You’re Ready To Vacation Together?
How To Enjoy Travelling When You’re Not On Your Honeymoon
I Fantasize About Other Men
Why It’s Easier To Meet Men On Vacation есть 100 дубликат на frisky
If You’re 300,000 Miles Away, Don’t Call Your New Man
Will Our Marriage Survive Our First Road Trip Together?
When On Vacation ... Just Say Yes

Andthatswhyyouresingle Says:
January 17th, 2012 at 2:41 pm
Forget about 6-8 weeks. This woman issued the “sex for committment” ultimatum after only a week and he agreed. There’s nothing healthy about that. No self-respecting guy does that unless he’s desperate or has an ulterior motive. Color me pessimistic.

This guy is a Grade A fraudster who’s taking advantage of the fact that this woman is new in town, has no real support system and no real social life. Which means she has no friends warning her or looking out for her. He is the center of her world.

She’ll do whatever he wants because he fits the profile – rich, handsome, a “CEO” (a nice bullshit title that self-employed people like to give themselves so they can sound more impressive) and eager to commit.

Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 16 Thumb down 10

Reply


DrivingMeNutes Says:
January 17th, 2012 at 3:32 pm
Agree about the CEO title, unless it’s given to you by a disinterested board of directors. And, you can take my word for it because, although I don’t have the credibility normally reserved for famed radio personalities in happy long term relationships, I am the Emperor of a nice Pile of Dirt.

Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 11 Thumb down 2

Reply


Crotch Rocket Says:
January 18th, 2012 at 11:12 am
“No self-respecting guy does that unless he’s desperate or has an ulterior motive.” Or he could simply be lying. After all, they’d only known each other a week; she has no reasonable basis to conclude this “commitment” meant anything because there hadn’t been enough time for him (or her, for that matter) to establish a track record of honesty.
Début de l'événement 21.02.2022
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]]> Fri, 21 Feb 2025 10:33:02 +0100 You are definitely dead on.

You are definitely dead on.

Description Why Sex Talk On a First Date Is a Bad Idea
Is He Interested or Just An Attention Whore?
Never Give a Man More Credit Then He’s Earned
Stop Accepting Bad Behavior From Men
When Do You Ask A Guy If Things Are Serious?
Is She Doomed To End Up Alone?
Why The “Hot” People In This Article Aren’t Worth Dating
When You Get Dumped Sometimes You’re To Blame, Too
Never Double Down On A Guy Who Can’t Guarantee He’ll Stick Around
How To Deal With The Push Pull Guy
Who Has More Luck Online – Men or Women?
The Tell Tale Tatt


Exactly! Everything is perfect upfront. Then when she’s hooked, the bad behavior comes out. That’s why both parties rush in to this. The other person in the relationship is usually really insecure and fears their “bad” behavior will come to light too, so they jump at the chance for commitment. This guy has all the things women say they want. An insecure woman or a woman who is anxious to lock a guy down is going to fall for this hook, line and sinker.

Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 47 Thumb down 15

Reply


wishing u well Says:
January 16th, 2012 at 10:28 am
You are definitely dead on. What I should have included as well (hope the OP reads this too) is that at the time that I went through this, I was having a moment of insecurity based on other things that were happening in my life. I had reached a point in which I started to doubt myself on some levels. Even though I was in the process of working on solutions to the problems I was facing, I felt I needed a “bright spot” in my life. It seems as if the wrong kind of men can almost smell the vulnerability at times. What helped is the fact that I’m a person who does what she says and expect others to do the same if they want to be in my life as a potential partner. So when actions changed and the mirage cleared, I left. But my insecurity at the time is what caused me to overlook the red flags – choosing instead to act on the “hope” that “maybe this will be real” and made the poor decision to give him a chance. Not my smartest moment, but hey, you live and you learn.

Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 45 Thumb down 1

Reply


Andthatswhyyouresingle Says:
January 16th, 2012 at 10:31 am
While I agree that the men can pick up on a woman’s vulnerability, I think initially the woman meets a man who she believes is out of her league (so she thinks) and pursues him because of that. That’s all tied to the insecurity and vulnerability. Having that man in her life validates her and helps her deal with her insecurity.
Début de l'événement 19.02.2022
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]]> Wed, 19 Feb 2025 10:39:22 +0100 Facebook is Amazing

Facebook is Amazing

Description Do You Reveal Too Much About Your Relationship?
Be Yourself: The Truth About Authentic Dating
Why So Many Relationships End at 90 Days
There really are NO BAD DATES!
How The Law of Attraction Can Help You Find Love
A Dude Diner’s Doctrine
Soundtrax To Your Life: Pre-Date Tunes
Ms. Awesome’s Advice for Men
Bad Relationships Aren’t Investments
How To Get A One Nite Stand Out Of Your Apartment

Just a quick story, broken down in bullet points:

Halloween, I met a bunch of girls, got a bunch of phone numbers.
I pre-gamed with Four Lokos and continued to stop in bars for beers while out.
I didn’t remember what half of the chicks whose numbers I got looked like the next day.
I mass texted them a few weeks later and tried to add them on Facebook.
One of them, who responded the best to my text, turned out to be a very attractive black girl.
I never texted her or anything again.
I ran into her a few weeks ago when I was in town.
It was a Friday night, I wasn’t sure she’d recognize me.
She was walking past with a group of friends and I just got in her way and pointed at her.
Her eyes lit up and she smiled real big.
She hugged me.
Next thing you know, she was all over me.
I would’ve never recognized her if I had never looked at her Facebook pictures.
I don’t even remember actually meeting her – just having her phone number afterwards and knowing that I did meet her on Halloween.
After running into her again, I texted her the next day…. I’ll pick up here…
Me, Sat, 12:20 pm: Wasup [her name]? It was good running into last night… enjoy work while the rest of us party all day at [event]

Her, Sat, 12:44 pm: Who is this?

Me, 1:18 pm: [WW]

Her, 1:19 pm: Who?

Me, 1:20 pm: The cute ass white boy. What you know me as [WW] or [Wonka]?

Her, 1:21 pm: [Wonka]. Lol.

Me, 1:31 pm: I didn’t realize you were so short! I hope you weren’t wearing heels… but you were looking cute tho

Her, 1:33 pm: Yeah. I am 5’3. I’m tiny.lol. I didn’t wear heels. I was just in chill mode. Didn’t feel like dressing up

Me, 1:47 pm: I feel ya. What time you get off work?

Her, 1:47 pm: 6:30

Me, 1:51 pm: Ok. Text me when you get off then… I’ll be downtown somewhere, come grab a drink with me and chill for a bit

Her, 1:53 pm: Ok. I will do that. U know what

Me, 1:59 pm: What’s that?

Her, 1:59 pm: U remind me of robin thicke. Lol

She actually wound up flaking that night…which wasn’t too surprising – the calibration was off, and there was no real comfort or rapport, and logistically she didn’t know where I was and who I was with, just that I was downtown somewhere, at some party. But that’s not the point. The point is she’s hot as shit and she was all over me, and the only way we recognized each other is because we’re Facebook friends.

I’ve texted her and called her a couple of times since then… building the comfort now…

She’s pretty into me too, she’s on my romantic radar now.

Anyway, back to what Facebook is and can do:

It’s great at keeping girls in the loop, if you do it right.

I made some changes to my profile after Krauser and Jambone looked at it in London. The profile itself should basically be a little DHV’s and attraction triggers. No, you’re probably not going to create attraction in a girl just off of your Facebook profile, but if you create attraction when you meet her, and then have a good profile that piques her interest a bit, you’re much better off.

Then, it’s a great place to run game on chicks in chat, and even a bit in messages. Chat being the better of the two of course.. but some girls are never logged in, so you gotta keep em engaged back and forth a bit through messages first.

I think Facebook is particularly better than texting for sets where you didn’t really get a lot of time in with the girl when you meet her. Yeah, if you read Mystery Method or Bang, they make it sound like you need to be in set with a girl for like 2 hours the night you meet her, but that’s not always the case. Some sets can go really well and only last 5 minutes – especially in day game. So, you’re obviously going to need to build more with these girls.

It’s harder to do that on text, because you don’t have much to go on besides callback humor. In a Facebook chat, there’s more new things to tease her about – recent photos, recent statuses, the funny name of the school she went to, whatever. You can also easily pull in photos and videos off of Google images or Youtube to quickly create some humor and add a lot of interaction to the chat. A picture is worth a thousand words, right?

Anyway… this is my goal for Facebook now. To keep girls in the loop, to keep them on my romantic radar. Plus, when they look through my pictures and stuff, that also adds to the comfort and rapport and helps them to feel like they know me better – like the girl, who I’ll call Short Model, in the earlier story. She wouldn’t have been all over me like that had she not looked through my photos on Facebook before and got a sense that she knows me a little bit, eventhough we’ve never actually talked.

We talk now though. She calls me almost as much as Ghetto Club does….

I’ll slow game her a bit, but I’ll say more about that in tomorrow’s post.
Début de l'événement 31.01.2022
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]]> Fri, 31 Jan 2025 11:03:37 +0100 You Have to Love Your Own Life First

You Have to Love Your Own Life First

Description Should Single Guys Use Emoticons
Leaving the Ghosts of an Ex Behind
Bitchiness as a Defense Mechanism: Lessons from Blogging About My Ex
Can You be Friends With an Ex?
The Men We Know We Have No Future With…
Men Who Ghost Before the First Date
No Strings Attached is Bullshit.
Do Women Really Want Equality In Relationships?
Your Best Friend the Hag
Why Being Single Doesn’t Suck
Rules For Hanging Out With Your Ex
How to Approach Guys in a Bar
How NOT to Approach A Guy In A Bar
8 Facts about Cheating

Lots of times people ask me “What do I need to do to find Mr/Ms Right.”

They get this look on their face…somewhere between ardent curiosity and abject desperation. I tell them to relax. First, you have to relax.

Then, stop and take a good look around. How is the rest of your life going?

What’s going well? What do you need to improve? What story are you telling yourself about your life, and your ability to find your perfect mate?

Here are some areas to look at:

1) Your Financial Situation. Are you stable? Do you have a plan? Are you handling your money the way you’d want Mr or Ms Right to handle theirs? If the answer is NO, then begin to take steps to handle your own money in a way that you respect. Like attracts like…so be LIKE that person you wish to attract.

2) Your Fun Factor Where are you in terms of actually enjoying your life? Do you have a circle of friends? Hobbies, Interests and Passions? Can you carry on a conversation about something you actually care about? are you Laughing? Doing things that push you out of your comfort zone and into a growth mode?

3). Your Career Are you happy with your work? Energized? If the answer is yes, then you’re way ahead of 80% of the American population. If the answer is no, explore what you can do to feel better about your work. Or at least find some reasons to be grateful for the job you do have. It’s a big turnoff to a prospective mate to meet someone who is miserable from 8 to 5 every day.

4) Your Physical and Spiritual Health Are you happy with your health habits? Could you be taking better care of yourself? If you were to share your physical and spiritual health routines with a prospective mate, would you feel proud?

5) Your Home And this is a big one. Whether you want to study Feng Shui and learn about why clutter holds you back, or the more modern version of clutter busting strategies…that’s up to you. The idea is this: Does you home accurately reflect you and how you want to present yourself? When you meet Mr or Ms Right, will there, literally, be SPACE for them?

Start to take a look at all of the areas of your life, and make an honest assessment of where you are. Like attracts Like. Be The Mate You Wish To See, and you’ll be in a much better position to meet someone that’s just perfect for you.
Début de l'événement 30.01.2022
Fin de l'événement 30.01.2022
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]]> Thu, 30 Jan 2025 10:18:08 +0100 alpha/dominant men

alpha/dominant men

Description When Do You Walk Away
It Is All Facebook’s Fault…
How To Be Single at Your 10 Year Reunion
Are One Night Stands Bad?
The Truth About Free Dating Sites
Writing Good Loveawake.com Emails
Taking it Slow vs Taking it Nowhere
26 Things I’ve Learned About Dating
Being Selfish in A Relationship
Signs of a Douchebag
Rules for a Skype Date


(So whenever a feminist tries to argue against women wanting alpha/dominant men by referring to studies where both women and men show preferences for kind men, throw this study in their face. Also can be used to argue against feminists who say that there is no difference in men and women’s attraction to kindness in their partners.)


on March 30, 2012 at 2:26 pm | Reply(R)Evoluzione.
Epic science comment. It looks like you’ve been reading Eric Barker.


on March 30, 2012 at 7:56 am | ReplyRex
When I ignore a girl after a few days, she starts acting really bitchy, and then clingy, saying things like “If you don’t want to see me just tell me. You can tell me, its cool”. Any ideas of a response?

I said just, “Nah, you’re cool”. But then she just started acting awkward.


on March 30, 2012 at 2:35 pm | ReplyHolden Caulfield
Bring da movies.


on March 30, 2012 at 11:36 am | ReplyAnonymous
Of course everyone here has seen the Huffington Post article by the 34 year old Natasha Scripture in New York who can’t find a good man (while trashing a 51 year old she was set up on a date with by a matchmaker for having had a slight speech impediment, for wearing bell bottom jeans on the date and for having a career as only a science textbook writer).

A lot of manosphere denizens are in the comment section which is already close to 1600 comments.
Début de l'événement 22.01.2022
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]]> Wed, 22 Jan 2025 10:39:06 +0100 Killing Prince Charming

Killing Prince Charming

Description A Relationship Evolved (and Happy Birthday To My Ex)
The Unforgettable First Kiss
Jealousy Versus Envy
Love Addict: The Pregnancy Dilemma
How Do You Help Someone Who Doesn’t Want Help?
Most Radical Relationship Books On the Market
We Hold Ourselves Back
What Happens When You Actually In Relationship??
Is a Same-Sex Encounter Important in Living Holistically?
You’re a Selfish Bitch and That’s Why You’re Not Married
Learning How to Love Yourself
Love Addict: Writing the Personal
How Do You Learn to Let Go?

I always used to hear people tell stories about how they met their spouse. It was always the story that, after all the romantic nonsense went away, they found their partner in the most god awful, non-romantic way imaginable. While I still held onto the belief that soul mates and fairy tale romantic stories still existed, I rebuffed these people and their horrible stories. It was always sad to me that they were so jaded and bitter and hurt that they lost faith in the fairy tale. I promised myself back then that I would never lose my fairy tale. prince charming on horse funny

Then over the years, life happened. I got older, hurt, jaded and bitter. And then one day I realized I lost the fairy tale. The hope that my Prince Charming would ride in on his white horse and rescue me from my life disappeared. I no longer wanted a Prince Charming because now I knew that Prince Charming was just looking for the next girl to bang, and would eventually leave me with heartbreak. On the day that it all changed, I finally knew that it was time to let go because I couldn’t take any more devastating heartbreaks.

It’s going to take a lot of alcohol to get sucked in by him again.

That day, my fairy tale turned into another lame story, one of the stories I promised never to be. Instead of Prince Charming, I wanted the “safe” guy. I was suddenly open to the guy who liked me, the one who was knocking down my door instead of the other way around. Even though I didn’t like him, he would eventually wear me down and I would start to date him, just like in all those other couples’ stories I heard before. And dating would turn into marriage, and I would learn to love him, and depend on him and rely on him. And I would be “happy” and never look back. I would never long for a fairy tale story again because I was married and happy to someone who treated me like I deserved to be treated.

And even though I know a little piece of me dies as I write this, I also know my fragile self cannot take one more heartbreak. In an act of self preservation, I have chosen to kill the fairy tale before the fairy tale kills me.
Début de l'événement 16.01.2021
Fin de l'événement 16.01.2021
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]]> Thu, 16 Jan 2025 10:57:32 +0100 Stanford law professor argues black women should marry outside their race

Stanford law professor argues black women should marry outside their race

Description Why Is Self-Esteem Important For Dating?
Top Free and Paid Online Dating Websites
Seizing New Dating Opportunities
The Perfect Movie Date at Home
Single Men Don’t Have Body Image Issues
What Makes a Good Man or a Good Woman?
Equating ‘Sexuality’ with Male Sexuality
Why in the World Would I Ever Get Married?
How Jealousy Can Work For Us
The Catalano Generation is Revolutionizing Dating
Mexico City's Short-Term Marriage Proposal
Even in Relationship You’re All Alone
I Lack the Commitment Gene
Stop Crying and Be a Man

A controversial new book has hit the market from Stanford law professor Ralph Richard Banks. In it, he argues that black women should look outside of their race when it comes to marriage, as more black women are getting advanced degrees, working at high positions in corporations, and taking on key roles in government than black men.

Here’s what the Mercury News article about the book suggests:

High rates of incarceration and job-market discrimination against black men have created a gender imbalance. Then women confront the venerable economic model of supply and demand - scarcity creates excess demand for black grooms, tilting the terms of courtship to men’s favor. Many simply sidestep commitment. EasyHookups

“Don’t marry down. Marry out,” says Banks, an African-American man married to a black woman.

Needless to say, this topic will get a rise out of a lot of people, one way or the other. The article references a couple of Bay Area women who agree, saying they’ve found they have more in common, both in terms of education and values, outside of their race.

On the other hand, experts from Howard University and the Robert C. Maynard Institute for Journalism Education say Banks research is skewed to show things in a certain light; that there are many black women who are happily married to black men with whom they are raising children.

Plus, there’s the argument that this take doesn’t address the real problem – institutionalized racism that continues to plague black men, greatly diminishing their prospects of being successful.

“Black women are the most loyal of all,” Banks says. “But they pay a very high price.”

What do you think about Banks’ argument? Is it valid or misrepresented?

Resource

1. https://lms.escapps.net/eportfolios/2196/Home/How_to_Choose_a_Sugar_Baby_Website

2. https://lms.macnet.ca/eportfolios/4935/Home/Online_Dating_for_Seniors_What_You_Need_to_Know

3. https://training.coursekey.com/eportfolios/2543/Home/My_Experience_as_a_ShortTerm_Sugar_Baby
Début de l'événement 10.01.2022
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]]> Fri, 10 Jan 2025 04:39:58 +0100 Comparing Dates to Ex’s

Comparing Dates to Ex’s

Description An Ode to Emily
More Than Meets The Eyes
Should I Tell Her How I Feel?
The Play Date
Dogs, Cats, and the Art of Dating: Lessons from the Cab Ride
The Colorado Connection That Could Never Be
When Love Feels Like a DIY Project: The Fixer-Upper Dilemma
Why Men Marry Some Women and Not Others
Should You Settle?
Is There Hope For The Gender Gap?
Cheating is a Cop Out
The Dance of Second Chances

So what do you think about this one? Whenever you date someone new, do you find yourself comparing them to previous ex’s?

Me, I think it’s kind of inevitable and even, maybe, natural? It doesn’t have to be comparing the new girl to a specific ex, but perhaps specific traits of all your ex’s.

Maybe one of your ex’s used to always know the right thing to say when you’re down, and another used to love exploring just like you did, and a third used to surprise you with little thoughts & things when you least expected them. You know what I’m talking about. Those great little things that made those past relationships so much fun while you were in them.

But of course, they all ended for a reason. One of your ex’s always had something negative to say, another always seemed too busy or too aloof, and another was just too high maintenance.

All of these traits become benchmarks for your next relationship. Either consciously or unconsciously, they’ve molded your expectations and standards. They’ve become what you look for or what you avoid. In effect, they form your basis of comparison.

At least for me, that’s how it is. Seems to come kind of naturally and unconsciously too.

How about you? Do you find yourself comparing your dates to ex’s?
Début de l'événement 08.01.2023
Fin de l'événement 08.01.2023
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]]> Wed, 08 Jan 2025 09:14:36 +0100 Trust Issues: The Temptation and Consequences of Snooping

Trust Issues: The Temptation and Consequences of Snooping

Description Questioning Dating Perferences
Jaded About Dating
Endless Evidence Gathering
Snooping on a Partner
Interracial Dating And Relationships
Why Do You Want to Be in a Relationship?
Being Really Smart Can Work Against A Woman
Flexibility in Modern Relationships
"Till Death Do Us Part"
Assembly Line of Hot
The Art of Selective Truths in Dating
Warning Signs on the First Date
Dani: In my experience, age and geography have been bigger factors than class, though I guess it’s all related. Through college and most of my 20s, all my serious boyfriends were black. As I’ve gotten older – in the last five years or so – that’s changed. In my late 20s and early 30s, I’ve moved a lot for work and have been part of several cities’ transient class, in which I’ve tended to spend time with people who are also not native to those cities and who do work similar to mine. In these circles, it’s been less likely that I meet black men, at least black men who aren’t colleagues. I also realize that a large part of not dating black men in recent years is related to having ended up on the West Coast, where interracial dating – especially among people who aren’t from here – is apparently required. During a phone conversation years ago, a black man who I had dated and who had moved to the Bay Area from the East Coast boasted about how much access he had to non-black women now that he was out west, and how much he was enjoying that. I remember asking who black women were with if black men were scrambling to be with white and Asian women and Latinas. He kind of snorted and said, “I don’t know. Each other, I guess.” He was going out of his way to be an asshole and I get that, but now that I live here, I see what he meant. Black men and women to seem to have a kind of aversion to each other out here. I still haven’t figured it out.

Kadian: I can’t ever remember my family discussing interracial relationships or even voicing an opinion. Perhaps because no one in my family ever dated outside their “race”? My family is Jamaican, and they pretty much have an issue with dating outside the culture. So even Black Americans are seen as culturally very different. However, the message that I received from the wider society/culture is that “interracial” pretty much means the romantic mixing of Blacks & Whites with no other real attention to other “racial” pairings. I do remember finding such pairings in film and television exciting, but somehow doomed to fail.

Over at Baggage Reclaim, Natalie has a fine post on overthinking and it's impact on relationships. This particular paragraph, early on in the piece, was really striking:

I have a friend who spent over a decade (yes you read that correctly) ruminating on her relationship. Every time we caught up about what was going on, she was trying to “work things out” or “figuring things out” or “deciding what the best thing to do is” and even “trying to avoid making a mistake”.


Having done some of this myself, I totally know how you can fall down that rabbit hole. Part of me knew six months into my first long term relationship that we were a poor match, but I didn't have the experience and insight yet to overcome the fear of ending it and being alone. We stayed together over three years.
Début de l'événement 02.01.2023
Fin de l'événement 02.01.2023
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